BRA
World Cup 2006: walking football
Missed this afternoon's game, and thus Togo's dancing, which is a shame. I wish I'd seen that and worked during France Switzerland. Anyway, here's the latest for those who follow such things.
TUESDAY
South Korea 2 Togo 1
Had to sacrifice one of today's matches. I chose this one. I chose badly.
France 0 Switzerland 0
Well, at least England Paraguay wasn't the worst match of the tournament so far. This was dreadful. I liked the lettering on the back of France's shirts, but that's about it. I still can't quite work out how come their three stars players have all retired from international football, and yet all have made a comeback, Gary Numan style, for the World Cup. I'll take advice on this from those who know better, but isn't that a bad sign? They're all well over 30 and bald. Even Thierry Henry, who is spoken of in hushed tones over here, looked a bit lost over there. But Desailly said before the match that he's not such a big star in France. This game was bad enough, but it was made worse by Mick McCarthy in the ITV commentary box. I've nothing against the Yorkshire accent - my favourite band sing in one - but his is such a monotonous drone. And he actually called somebody a "wally", possibly the ref, who was just trying to win a bet and give a yellow card to everyone on the pitch. He almost did it too.
Brazil 1 Croatia 0
I was looking forward, like everyone else, to Brazil's first match, but mainly so that it would say BRA at the top of the screen, which is really funny. Their reputation and five World Cup wins precede them, but it seems that a certain insouciance sets in, one that starts to look like smugness and not giving much of a toss as long as they win. They are clearly capable of greatness, and what Mark Lawrensen called "walking football", whatever that is. You can tell they're special: almost none of their players need two names. But as Croatia battled hard and consistently (consistently missing chances but at least getting shots in on goal throughout), Brazil just pottered about, holding them to a 1-0 victory after Kaka put a dream-like shot into the top corner of the net before half time. Lawrensen said of Ronaldo in the first half, "He almost looks interested," and joked that he ran faster when he left the field to be substituted in the second half than he had done all match. This is the received view. Alan Hansen also observed of the buck-toothed superstar, "He's carrying some timber" (which means, in Scottish, that he has put on a bit of weight - but we knew that. Look at the way part of that concrete plinth crumbles away beneath his feet on the mobile phone advert.) But you can say what you like about the Brazilians. They win World Cups. This was still an exciting watch, despite the apparent lack of effort by one team. You had to admire the Croatians for their pluck and strength - the supporters, obviously, who were magnificent. Looking in their red and white check like a giant gingham picnic blanket laid out over the stands of Berlin's mighty Olympiastadion, their communal singing towards the end, when it was clear they were getting nil points, was like a warm balm washing over you. Hypnotic.
I shall miss two out of three matches tomorrow, as it's back to the office. Still, Germany Poland's got to be worth staying in for.
posted by Andrew Collins @ 8:52 PM
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9 Comments:
Germany Poland... fiver says Motty gets a reference to WWII in before half time.
Just watching "They Think Its All Over"...is that the Trevor Locke chap you're writing with ? How the hell do you get any work done ?
Mick McCarthy ... with his arse in the bacon slicer... you had to be there.
Big egos sometimes forget that you have to compete to win matches; they can expect it to be easy but it's never going to be easy in such warm weather - you're going to have to sweat. Great goal from Kaka though, he showed you don't have to smash it as hard as possible.
I'm despairing over most of the commentary teams. Mick McCarthy was an absolute tool. Listening to 5 Live doesn't work too well because the tv pictures are lagging behind. Perhaps there's a way that you could start doing commentary via this site Andrew...
Mick McCarthy is indeed very poor. 4 years ago he was engaged in a power strugle with Roy Keane as boss of Ireland - that and managing the worst team to have played in the Premiership (Sunderland) seems to have taken its toll on his powers of analysis.
Mark Lawrenson is better but I always think I'm hearing Alistair McGowan with the slightly effeminate intonation. Motty's a lost cause, for me, and I've started resorting to 5Live commentary via the red button. That way you don't get the satellite delay.
I fancy Germany to take Poland tomorrow by way of a surprise attack.
I think Ukraine - Spain will be the best match tomorrow, possibly because I have no chance of seeing it (just like the Togolese dancing...).
People expect too much from Brazil, but Croatia had to work really hard for that non-result & the Brazilians were just ambling about, really. Oh and, Mick McCarthy was dreadful. But Martin Jol on the radio was arguably as bad.
Peter, I didn't see They Think It's All Over, but Trevor Lock, if it was he, isn't the chap I'm working with (although he does assist Russell Brand on 6 Music so there is a connection). The chap I'm working with is Lee Mack, the host.
Yes, I forgot to mention Motson's opening gambit about the Berlin stadium and the Nazi salutes that took place there in 1936 at the Olympics, followed by a reference to war-torn Croatia. I sort of admired him for his sense of history, but it did seem an odd sort of place to be talking about war. (Mind you, congratulations to the British Foreign Office for advising the British Olympic team to join Canada and France in doing the Nazi salute as a gesture of friendship to Hitler.)
I like Mark Lawrenson, but only because of Alistair McGowan.
My favourite match by far was Italy-Ghana, partly because it actually included some goals, but mainly (if I'm honest) because of the Italian players. Particularly Toni...
Motson is past his best, I think that was fair to say at the last, heh, World Cup. "Are we going to see a goal scored at breakfast time Mark? we are you know" usw. Mark Lawreson has always annoyed me with his attempts at comedy (and not giving Nicky Southall Goal of The Month for January 2000.) Martin Jol on Radio 5 is fantastic and didn't spend all of last night fan-w*nking Brazil everytime (Motson saying "This looks omnious" everytime Brazil were 40 yards out with 6 Croats in front of them) and gave a proper analysis instead. ITV's coverage is as shocking as it always is, constant talk of England and Tydsley's excitement at having a real manager next him sticking uo for his club's players even when they weren't fouled against Japan.
Martin Jol could be the commentating find of the tournament. You never quite know what he's going to say next which is the main problem with football punditry and interviews - predictability.
Only when they've had chance to reflect on the game and prepare the post-match analysis do most pundits come up with something original to say.
Leonardo is struggling on the BBC team and seems a bit initimidated by Hansen. At least racist Ron Atkinson isn't around this time.
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