Don't box me in
Domestic God
I'm here to tell you, with a certain amount of multi-tasking pride, that this morning I boxed in the pipes in the downstairs toilet while simultaneously making a delicious chicken stock with last night's carcass. That's carpentry and cookery at the same time. I should have my own TV programme. The boxing was easier and harder than I'd imagined - the sawing of the wood to fit around the pipes, using a jigsaw and special drill bits, was easier, and the mounting of the plywood onto wooden beams was easier, but the fixing of the beams to the plastered walls was harder, in that I was working on my knees around a toilet bowl, basin and heated radiator, which I was trying not to damage in any way, as they're new. It's pretty cramped in there, and I had to cut a couple of corners (not literally), but I'm still pretty chuffed with the end result. It cost me no more than the price of the wood from B&Q and a morning on my knees. I've primed it, ready to undercoat tomorrow morning. And the stock came out OK too.
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Forgot to mention that when I went out to post a letter on Tuesday evening, I walked along the road that adjoins ours and noted, once again, that in a relatively litter-free area, it only seems to be people who eat McDonald's or drink Carlsberg Special Brew who drop their packaging on the grass verges, from moving cars I suspect. What does this tell us about litter louts? That they eat crap food and drink disgusting beer. However, here's my social-engineering theory blown out of the water: on Tuesday I saw a discarded Phil Collins CD. Face Value, featuring the excellent In The Air Tonight and I Missed Again, but not a lot else of note. I think this, too, was cast from the window of a moving car. The jewel case was smashed and the disc loose, just sitting there, with Phil's big, divorced face staring impassively up from the grass. It was obviously thrown out in a fit of taste. Imagine the scene. A row, perhaps? A punishment after heavy words lightly thrown? "Right! If you don't take that back, Phil goes out of this window!" I rather admire the person for going through with it. It's an easy threat to make, but to actually commit ...
I think the people who throw beer cans and Coke cups are just ignorant twats.
posted by Andrew Collins @ 9:56 PM
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9 Comments:
I happen to like Face Value a lot, in a miserable sort of way, but had to laugh at your imagined argument.
I hope you don't mind me going off at a tangent here, but seeing you mention Phil reminded me that you used to be 'into' Peter Gabriel as a lad. I was too, a couple of years behind you, and he remains my all time favourite artist. I'm curious to know if you moved on and left him behind, or whether you still have a soft spot for his music.
As I approach 40, I still find myself listening to, and enjoying, the same music I enjoyed more than 20 years ago, much to the amusement of my mates!
Oh, I agree that litter-louts are effing twats!
Doug
And the name of your buildings and food tv show - "Tarpaulins and Macaroni"?
Sorry - really awful but I couldn't resist.
Are people who discard Starbucks cups simply a better breed of antisocial scumsucking pigfarts?
I unfortunately live within a few hundred meters of a ghastly KFC. Quite what posses people to eat that stuff, I do not know. The litter that generates from that shop is insurmountable.
Not only do they treat their birds disgracefully, they pretty much treat anyone within a one mile radius of their shops with a fair amount of disrespect.
I think they should have some responsibility for the environment they trade in. I’d hazard a guess that most people who eat deep fried chicken bones are idiots anyway, so it might be beyond their realms of understanding to take home their litter or, even more forward-thinking than that, place what they’re about to discard in a litter bin. The company on the other hand are clearly of a higher stock. They’ve tapped into a part of society who are too lazy to cook and would rather take home for the children a bucket of bones and chips.
I once mentioned to a member of staff at my local KFC that they could maybe do with looking into placing a few more litter bins round the area of their shop, to which came a reply: “We are not the council nor do we have the right to tell customers what to do with their rubbish.” And so that told me...
Heavens, how judgemental, Stef. Yes, people should not litter. But calling them idiots simply for eating fried chicken? What's that all about?
I was been a little ironic, Elmsyrup! I wouldn't be as judgemental as to say that all people who eat fried chicken are idiots, I actually like a nice corn-feed chicken myself, just the people who buy it from KFC...
*hopes the irony comes through*
A small confession here, I did once throw my Brothers Abba Gold tape out of the window in the Eighties. To make matters worse it was in the middle of The New Forest. I have felt guilty ever since!
Did I buy him another one? Of course not, he's my Brother and Brothers do stupid things like that
Ian
Abba? What were you thinking? It's a classic!!
Heavy words are so lightly thrown?
The devil will find work for idle hands to do... :o)
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