118 11-Hate
I hate 118 118. I realise there are more pressing matters and more constructive ways of channelling my negative energies, but they are really starting to try my patience. I have nothing against the two actors who play the comedy 1970s runners - it's the Holy Grail of regular acting work for them - but I hate the whole way the service is marketed, and has been marketed since its inception in 2003, when, like every other public service, directory enquiries was deregulated and sold off to help buoy up our economy for the future (that went well). Since then, even though there are apparently 200 separate directory enquiry services, three of them control 90% of the market and these three are the richest and can thus afford to assail us from every angle with advertising (the jolly, matey, muckabout, oh-so-English 118 118 is owned by an American company). What I hate most about 118 118, apart from the way they have bought their own popularity, and the dreary nature of their adverts and sponsorship idents, is the latest boardroom money-making wheeze: Ask Us Anything. You can phone or text them any question - that's any question - and they claim they will answer it "asap." After another irritating advertising blitz (the appalling free newspaper Metro is "wrapped" in a false 118 118 cover today), I decided to pay the money and text them this question:
In what way is paying 118 118 to answer a question better than looking it up on the Internet for free?
I texted it at 8.58am. By 9.30, I had received no answer, so when I got to the coffee shop, I used the free service offered as part of the promotion on their website to ask this follow-up question:
I texted you a question 32 minutes ago and have not received the answer: have you overstretched yourselves with this latest advertising blitz?
I received the answer to this one, by text, almost immediately, at 9.33:
No charge. Please direct any questions to our customer service department on 0800 3891118 (Mon-Fri 9am-5pm). Thank you for using 118 118.
Then, at 9.52, almost an hour after my first question, I received an answer (I refer you back to my first question, above):
We use a mix of brainpower, a hint of ingenuity then we mix it with the internet, this makes a delicious explosion of unmatched responses everytime! [sic]
Then, I received this follow-up text at 9.55am:
The 118 118 text team felt that the last answer took us longer to answer than we'd like. So this time we haven't charged you. Please text 118 118 again soon.
Do you know what, I don't think I will. I still hate 118 118.
posted by Andrew Collins @ 9:34 AM
21 Comments
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Andrew at
21 Comments:
I don't understand your hatred of this service. I agree that their directory enquiries service is shocking (50p per min if you choose to connect through them, I think?) but Ask have been doing a similar thing to 118 for a while. Texting a question can actually be very useful.
I am the sort of man who gets into stupid drunken discussions in the pub that take on enormous meaning for myself and the other party despite being futile and meaningless. I was at loggerheads with an old work colleague on the topic of whether John Goodman is dead. Neither of us have blackberries or access to the internet, so a text to Ask solved the problem - and I won more than my quid back with my win from the fiver bet.
On another occasion, I was forced to admit that a song with the lyrics 'Smile like you mean it' is by the Killers, not the Bravery as I had idiotically insisted.
In the bookshop, Saturday, I couldn't recall the name of Paul Auster's wife, and neither could my missus. In ten seconds we had the answer and made the purchase.
Finally, and best of all, lost and looking for a hidden pub I couldn't remember the name of, Ask not only texted me the directions to the pub but also texted a list of other good pubs in the area.
If you don't have a smartphone and are in desperate need of an answer, this service is pretty handy. Despite the expense. But a quid really isn't much these days, is it?
There used to be an official (presumably government/OFCOM) website explaining the change from 192 to the hundreds of others (I seem to remember it was newdirectoryenquiries.co.uk, but I can't seem to find it anymore) and it had the details of them all and an FAQ. They actually had a helpful question which went something like "So how do I know which number I should call?" which was followed up with "we suggest that when you want a number you should visit this website to view the current prices for each service and then pick which is most suitable for your needs.
That would almost certainly take far longer than going to the BT website and using their free service.
192 wasn't particularly cheap, but at least you knew what you were getting, you knew that you probably couldn't get the information cheaper elsewhere, and if you got a rubbish service you could phone up BT on the number on the sticker that most people had on their phone to complain.
People don't want choice. They think they want it, but they don't.
well at least this democratises pub quizes a bit. It used to be that you had to have a swanky phone with a full internet browser AND a decent internet package to be able to cheat. Now ANYONE can cheat in pub quizes, apart from the poorest of the poor who have no mobiles at all.
It's called the onward march of progress.
http://www.robincooper.co.uk/mp3/voice.mp3
I texted them a few weeks ago, with a question about train times. I was just leaving the Bloomsbury theatre when i texted, and i wanted to know whether trains still went to my part of Kent from Charing Cross, to save me the effort of getting to Victoria when the Vic line was closed. Pretty straightforward question, i thought, so i assumed i'd have an answer by the time i had walked from the theatre to the tube station at Euston.
I had not. No matter though, i thought, i'll just pop upstairs when i get to Embankment and surely the text will come through then, and i can make my decision.
Nope. I got the text well over an hour later, once i had gone to Victoria, waited for my train and got more than halfway home. Helpful!! I use 118 247 (Yellow Pages, i think) all the time to find out phone numbers, and they're always great. You can't text them any old ridiculous question but... why would you need to?
On a different note, Andrew - I've just started reading Where Did It All Go Right? (I bought all of your books a few weeks back after really enjoying the podcasts - freeconomics, see?) and just wanted to say how much i'm enjoying it. What's a sossie, though? You talk about them a lot in the chapter about food but i don't think it's been explained... sausage, maybe?
Some years ago a law firm in Scotland advertised promising that they could answer any legal query. My flatmate and myself had newly qualified as solicitors and are now both academic. We phoned up the freephone number on a nightly basis posing a variety of questions:
Does property law have a causal or abstract theory of transfer?
Is section 3 of the Land Registration (Scotland) ACt 1979 curative in effective?
Can trusts effectively be used to create securities over corporeal moveable property when the property has not been delivered to the beneficiary?
For some reason they didn't answer these questions and then took to hanging up when we called.
I will let you know if 118 118 have any more joy with these queries.
Scott
I agree with your dislike of the privatised directory inquiry service. How is it benefitting me exactly? It costs a fortune.
I used to work for a similar service that answered anyy questions, AQA, and they used to treat their workers like shit. You basically had to have another job during the day in order to mke ends meet. It is basically a cash cow for the company that promotes the service - they keep 70% of the revenue and the workers only 30% and so there is no guarantee of minimum wage.
Also, there is a real pressure on you to deliver answers. They are very very strict about spelling punctuation and grammar but accuracy isn't very important, and yes you basically do just look up stuff on google to get the answer.
It does have its uses - settling answers in a pub quiz when your stake is worth more than the cost of the text - when you are away from a computer for example. So I do think you are a little harsh in implying that it has no use.
But yes, ultimately it is a big con, and I know I was stung by 118118 for £2 when I asked a question and it was marketed as a free trial day.
saliwho:
I loved the Robin Cooper call! His letters are great, I didn't realise there were phone calls too...
Was just listening to your link at work and the first time he said 'banged my head' I sniggered so hard I must've snapped some blood vessels....
Hi - I'm writing from AQA 63336. Whilst everyone's entitled to their opinion on what it's like to work, or to have worked for us, I want to correct a few facts concerning us in Mike’s post.
Firstly, in terms of the revenue we get, we split it 50/50 with the researchers. Out of the £1 you spend to text 63336, 15p goes to the Government, the phone operators take their share, and the rest is split between us and researchers.
Secondly, of course there is pressure on researchers to produce answers - we answer 19,500 questions a day. But we care about accuracy as much as we do about style. We care, and our researchers care, about getting you correct, concise, fast answers that can wow you - to any and every question that you ask.
If we ever get it wrong, or can’t answer your question, then we’ll refund you or do whatever it takes to make you happy. We aim to provide excellent customer service in everything that we do.
I'll leave you to see for yourself how good you think we are - we were the first service set up on a premium text code, we are the biggest in the UK (1.6 million customers and over 12 million answers to date), but we never rest in ensuring that we provide the best answers, and correct information.
A free advert there for AQA, but it seems only fair if Mike was misleading about the split in profits.
On another point: aren't you supposed to answer the questions in a pub quiz based on your own brains?
Anyway, it's the 118 118 branding, advertising and ubiquity that wind me up. I just tried the service out to annoy them.
Vik: sossies was indeed what we called sausages in Northampton when I was a kid. That'll be 35p.
The Metro != "appalling free newspaper"!
My wife and I both work for AQA, from what we see "behind the scenes" the researchers care about the quality of answers and people put real time and effort into their answers. Yes there's pressure for answers, but that's because we have paying customers waiting!
Anyway, I've shot my credibality by saying that I work for the company, so why not find out for yourself, text any qyestion to 63336 or ask them a free question here
http://63336.com/free_question_and_answer.htm?indexpage
OK, that's enough adverts.
Bernard Matthew's Chicken Kievs - 3 for only £2.00 at Hackney Costcutters, Greenwood Road. Go today to avoid disappointment.
2 quid?! I wouldn't give 20p for any part of the 3 legged Frankenbirds. Anyway if they're Matthew's, shouldn't they be Chicken Fatsa or Batman (they are places in Turkey in case you wondered. Thought not).
I must stop eating Turkish Delight at work, the sugar's playing buggery with my brainwaves.
As a regular quizmaster, I find the use of anything other the brain to answer questions abhorrent. What's to be gained by cheating? When I catch people cheating I take points off them without telling them. Touche.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=RK4Xye7AErE
I tend to use Maureen, simply because I like Brian Sewell.
Yes, timewaster letters/robert popper stuff is great.
But Willie Donaldson was the master with his Henry Root Letters.
I also love his description of Paris Hilton - he said she looked like a shivering whippet dipped in bleach.
A mad under-rated crack-addict genius. May he rest in peace.
I decided to pit these services against each other.
I asked 118 what question will 82 ask be unable to answer?
82 Ask will not be able to answer this question: "Where is the 118 Ask Us Anything Team based?". Thank you.
(I am only using the free messages by the way)
I ask 82 ask the same question, there response.
118.com try their best to answer any question, however we don't think they'll be able to answer, who scored the last goal at anfield before the Kop was torn down.
will post the new answers nother time
I don't like the 118 ads much either, but I absolutely hate that Halifax ad where they murder the Beach Boys. I mean, I didn't think those Halifax ads could get any worse, so appalling were they already, but this one is a new extremely irritating low.
John
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