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Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Bighand thornyhead

What? A podcast? On Wednesday? Yes. Richard and I convened at his house yesterday because a) he's selfishly gigging on Friday, and b) we were there to have our photographs taken by a nice woman called Elsa for the Independent On Sunday's iconic How We Met feature, for which we had to be interviewed about each other. Who knows how it will turn out, or whether it will run - we're both too hardened and cynical to believe it will ever run - but it was fun to be photographed again by a professional, especially as it meant Richard and I went into his garden for the first time. (I don't think he's ever been into it before.) Thus, Collings & Herrin Podcast Number 21 is out there. We hope you like it.

This is a picture taken with my laptop while we were having our photograph taken by Elsa with an actual camera:

23 Comments:

At Wed Jul 09, 10:57:00 AM , Blogger qrter said...

Ooh you're speaking my language! Well, holding it..

 
At Wed Jul 09, 11:04:00 AM , Blogger Andrew Collins said...

What does it say?

 
At Wed Jul 09, 11:20:00 AM , Blogger Richard Herring said...

It says,
Sluit = Look at me!
Je ann = I have on
bij het = back to front
menselijk = women's (lit. men's not)
ras = underpants.

 
At Wed Jul 09, 11:31:00 AM , Anonymous Swineshead said...

Only just finished the last one, and now there's a new one? Cripes...

By the way, 'lork and fork' had me doubled up as I tried to do the washing up yesterday. Very funny stuff.

 
At Wed Jul 09, 11:37:00 AM , Blogger MerseyMal said...

according to http://babel.altavista.com/ it translated to "you dovetail humanity" which doesn't make much sense so I'm agreeing with Richard instead.

Unless it should have been "kiss humans ducks"

 
At Wed Jul 09, 12:21:00 PM , Blogger Famulus said...

It means "Become part of humanity"...

Obviously you do this with the right underpants... ;-)

 
At Wed Jul 09, 12:26:00 PM , Anonymous jwmuk said...

"join the human race" is what my dutch friend says it means.

I am starting to feel a bit uncomfortable about the incessant bullying of the erudite Collings by the oafish Herrin but I have to keep reminding myself it is all just make believe. Think the latest podcast is one of the best...

 
At Wed Jul 09, 12:56:00 PM , Blogger wowser said...

Wow! Bi-weekly? Is it now bi-weekly, or will we have to wait EVEN LONGER for podcast 22? Having downloaded all 20 podcasts in one fell swoop, I now have a huge backlog of Broadcasting House and In Our Time podcasts building up, unlistened to.

The unsubscribe thing was my idea, so do blame me if it doesn't work.

 
At Wed Jul 09, 01:02:00 PM , Blogger Andrew Collins said...

It doesn't work. Good. We cannot cheat our new-found unpopularity.

The next podcast will be recorded next Thursday, July 17, so will presumably be available that afternoon.

The week after, it's back to Friday (July 25). And then Richard's off to Edinburgh so we'll see what we can do. We're still hoping to do a live podcast, in front of an audience, during the day, in Edinburgh, on Wednesday August 6 - we'll keep you posted on that.

 
At Wed Jul 09, 01:09:00 PM , Blogger wowser said...

Live audience! SO you ARE the new Baddiel and Skinner.

 
At Wed Jul 09, 02:08:00 PM , Blogger qrter said...

That's right, it says "join the human race".

 
At Wed Jul 09, 04:14:00 PM , Anonymous paul said...

If anyone ever suggests sponsoring this, please say no - as you would undoubtedly have to curtail all the purile adolescent gibberish and therefore the best 99% of the show. Nice to know there's no such thing as a grown-up, thank god. I thought it was just me.

 
At Thu Jul 10, 09:03:00 AM , Anonymous paul said...

Speaking of oatmilk etc Andrew, can you perhaps talk a little about why you went wheat free please? I gave up wheat and dairy a few years ago and felt terrific for it; having loads more energy both physical and mental and got so much more done. Inevitably, after a few months I slipped back into my old habits. But I've been inspired by your obviously boundless energy and proflicacy to do so again. I would guess you've probably discussed this in one of your books, but if so I haven't got to that bit yet. Have you mentioned this anywhere else on your blog? If so, can you point me in the right direction. Very much appreciated.

 
At Thu Jul 10, 09:32:00 AM , Blogger Andrew Collins said...

I slide on and off the wagon myself, Paul. But the reason I originally cut out not wheat but white flour (rye, spelt, demeter, other "ancient grains" all excellent alternatives) was a lifestyle choice, not necessarily because of an intolerance. Then I had some food intolerance blood tests done and found out that I was intolerant - also to dairy products. So I cut them out and, like you, felt a whole lot better in terms of energy etc. I lost weight too. But it's a really tricky one to pull off, as we are literally bombarded with white flour-based snacks wherever we go: muffins, sandwiches, wraps, paninis, pastries. What a white flour-free diet actually does is force you to make more imaginative choices and - eek! - take food out with you to snack on, rather than relying on coffee shops and the like. As I say, I eat wheat-based things in lazy moments, and I know it's no good for me. Equally with dairy, which definitely aggravates my asthma. I had some ice cream the other night and started wheezing almost immediately. So it's in my interest not to eat it.

It's a personal choice. In the late 90s, after illness drove me out of my last full-time job - editor of Q [see: That's Me In The Corner - ha!] - I underwent a conversion to healthy living. I am not a saint, and in fact, it's much more advisable to give yourself treats otherwise you'll just pack it all in. I used to not drink any alcohol. Now I drink some, occasionally. Much better. I also eat a panini occasionally, and enjoy it.

Being wheat and dairy free is my ideal. You have to have something to aim for. (Also, it provides good comedy material for me to be a food crank for Richard on the podcasts.)

White flour used to be fine about 50 years ago but the industrialisation of agriculture has made the gluten in modern wheat difficult for anybody to digest. (They grow the wheat to withstand harsher conditions, to improve yields, and our digestive systems have yet to catch up with it. That's my layman's understanding of what's happened.)

 
At Thu Jul 10, 02:01:00 PM , Blogger goodbyetoallfat said...

"Equally with dairy, which definitely aggravates my asthma"

I didn't know this, Andrew, and have only been diagnosed with asthma this year. I do consume quite a lot of milk, in cereals and tea and coffee etc. Maybe I will have to start thinking differently.

Anyway I only came back here to see all the translations of the Dutch sign thingy -- bet you didn't know you had so many Dutch speaking readers, did you? Ha!

 
At Thu Jul 10, 02:13:00 PM , Blogger Andrew Collins said...

If you ask the Milk Marketing Board they say that dairy products definitely do not aggravate asthma. They say this forcefully here. Mind you, it is their job to encourage you to drink milk. There are some pretty persuasive arguments for not drinking milk here if you scroll down. I just trust my own experience of eating it and not eating it. You decide.

 
At Thu Jul 10, 05:25:00 PM , Blogger wowser said...

What about pasta? Do you only eat the brown stuff?

 
At Thu Jul 10, 05:33:00 PM , Blogger Andrew Collins said...

If I'm going to eat pasta, I just eat pasta. There are loads of wheat-free varieties - rice, spelt, corn etc., but they're not as nice. I told you, I'm no saint.

 
At Thu Jul 10, 07:21:00 PM , Anonymous rambu said...

stop talking about wheat Andrew!! Blimey I don't know how Richard puts up with you in the workplace!

 
At Sun Jul 13, 06:12:00 PM , Anonymous Joseph said...

I noticed that richard slipped in the "28 years old I was" joke in this week.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kQNVd3anis


nice to know he's mastered it.

 
At Tue Jul 15, 02:43:00 PM , Blogger Zoonie said...

Having just read of the weakling Collins and his rubbish intolerances, I would like to pass on to all fellow weaklings that Goats and Sheeps milk products may (accented heavily) be tolerable to people with asthma / eczema who get aggravated by cow dairy.

I say this based on the evidence of 1 person only: my son, who came out in some kind of alien horror bumps 3 weeks afer he was born, I cut out wheat, dairy and soya and they (nearly) all miraculously went away (I was feeding him, y'see). I usually drink Goat's milk myself, so whilst trying to find out what it was that was causing it, I went back to my un/usual milk and he didn't react particularly (I had been eating cow cheese before the attacks, or ice cream, or something else from cows, in any case). He's always drunk goats milk - had some cow's milk once and came out in hives, which is not ideal. He does occasionally get asthma attacks but to be honest, I think he'd be getting them anyway because he's only wee and gets a new cold every 5 minutes.

So. Plus, you can now get Goat's double cream in Waitrose, I have discovered. So you can pretend to be so posh you shop in there regularly, get some and make home made ice cream, so you don't miss out on the fatness inducing summer treat like you might do normally.

He also has sheeps milk yogurt, which is very creamy and lovely, and can be purchased from all big, evil supermarkets these days, astonishingly.

Hopefully vaguely of use to someone or other.

 
At Tue Jul 15, 02:56:00 PM , Blogger Andrew Collins said...

None of this is an exact science, Zoonie - you have to experiment a bit. Different combinations work for different individuals. I'm glad you've found a way through your son's intolerances. The only way to do it is, as you did, cut food groups out and see what happens. You don't have to go to the expense of getting intolerance tests done, as I did. (Unless you are actually allergic, it's perfectly possible to cut down on certain food groups and feel better, too. I can handle a bit of dairy, but not too much. A good rule of thumb I find is: if you crave something, as I do with cheese, steer clear of it!)

I wish I'd been breast-fed - it's the best start in life you can get with regards these types of ailment. Not that I blame my Mum, of course. It wasn't exactly all the rage in the 60s.

 
At Tue Jul 29, 09:20:00 PM , Blogger goodbyetoallfat said...

Thanks to your tip about milk (and dairy stuff) not being all it's cracked up to be, I started thinking differently about my basic food choices (mainly breakfast which was always previously rubbish stodgy sugary cereals and half a bowl of milk).

Whilst I'm not really sure yet if my new food plan has alleviated the asthma, it has led to much quicker weight loss. (Who knew? Give up milk and yogurts and lose weight - ha!)

I have now cut milk *nearly* out completely except for a dash of milk in bog standard builder's tea (I might graduate to fruit and herbal teas one day, but not quite yet).

I have outlined my new food plan (which includes either oatcakes or rye bread for breakfast) in my new blog of today's date (29 July).

I know a diet blog is probably not your normal type of read Andrew, but your tip about dairy got me thinking differently.

As far as cutting out bread and wheat is concerned, I have no known allergies, but just thought it might be an idea to try a few weeks without it -- again the weight loss has been quicker and I feel less bloated!

You wear so many hats, Andrew -- media commentator to the masses, but wheat and dairy free diet guru to others !!!

 

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